Home Again!

WE MADE IT!!!

You should have seen Millie's face when we walked in!! She was very happy to see us.

The flight was a little rougher than the flight down there as we were passing over a cold front. We made sure to get the first seats this time so that Mike didn't have to be so uncomfortable with his long legs. Also, we were right next to the bathroom so that made him feel better too.

We arrived almost 25 minutes early but by the time we got our luggage we only waited about 10 minutes before Casey and Ryan picked us up.

We enjoyed the ride home and feel so good that our children would have each one shared so much with us.

Grandma is still asleep so I guess we will hear from her in the morning.

Can't wait to go to bed in my big bed!!!

Thanks again, kids! We love you all!

PS...Mike has decided to take up white water rafting next!! HAHAHAHAHA

Sunny Sunday

Well, it is about over! We went to church at Sarasota Baptist Church this morning. It was a bit different from what we are used to as they have "praise and worship" music with guitars and drums and a praise and worship team. They also have an orchestra that was good. The choir was very good and we had no trouble understanding the words to their song since they had them up on the screen.

The pastors sermon was on Jonah. This is a special book to me as I was saved as a small child and the sermon that was being preached when I went forward was about Jonah.

The pastor this morning preached about the cycle we go through in the christian life. I am trying to remember it.....Running.....Crying....Obedience....Judging. His point was that we are all somewhere in there. First we may be running from God. If so, God will orchestrate the things around us to bring us to Him. At that point we may cry to Him for deliverance. He presents us with a command to obey. As we obey Him and begin to once again grow closer to Him, our nature dictates to us that we judge. We may begin to judge those around us in comparison. We don't want to do that. We need to judge ourselves and then go back to obedience and make it a spiral instead of a circle. It was a good sermon and I must say, I had to check myself as the "layed back" attitude about dress and music was bringing out a little judgemental attitude in me. Lord, please forgive me.

We have supper to eat and then an hour trip to the St. Petersburg/Clearwater airport before our plane takes off at 9:25....arriving at home at 10:55. Lord give us safety!

Can't wait to sleep in my own bed tonight and I know Shawn and Shannon will be glad to do the same.

Saturday Sunset

Awesome!!!! That is the only word I can think to describe my feelings about tonight. Ok...I am jumping ahead of myself.

We got up this morning and while the kiddos slept in, I did my laundry and fixed us some breakfast, then cleaned the kitchen back up. I got to catch up on my Bible reading and read some on my counseling book. Those were things I really needed to do.

When the kids got up we enjoyed a little time and then Shannon and I went to a friends house who is selling all of her earthly possesions in lieu of a trip to China as a teacher and missionary. Shannon got some nice things for just a few dollars.

We then went to Burger King for something to tide us over until supper.

We were to meet Tommy and Megan at 5:00 at the marina where Tommy's boat was docked. This was such a nice thing for him to do. This is his business and it would have cost us a lot of money to have gone on this "sunset cruise" if he had not offered. They brought me a nice bouquet of flowers which was totally unexpected.

I couldn't help but fight back tears as we started out. God's creation is so unique and beautiful!! The colors of the water, the sky, the beautiful homes, the clouds with the sun streaming through it and then the sun going over the horizon were all breathtaking. As it began to get dark, the lights of the city were spectacular.

After docking, we walked to an Italian restaurant and Mike and I had pizza. I will have to say that pizza is better than the seafood. Sorry...I just don't care that much for seafood! The night air was very comfortable.

I just can't believe we are experiencing all these things in January!

Well, tomorrow morning we will be going to Sarasota Baptist Church and then coming back to eat roast out of Shannons crockpot. Our flight home leaves at 9:?? so we will have to be at the airport around 8ish. We will leave more rested and with many good memories.

I would highly recommend the Sarasota area to anyone who wants to have a nice vacation. There are so many eating establishments and other fun things to do. You can always charter a fishing trip with Tommy also at www.catchthespiritfishing.com.

Well, I have to go wash the sea shells I gathered for the bus kids.....don't tell anyone but I think some of them were inhabited. I opened the sack this morning and the smell was less than pleasant.

Thank you Lord for allowing us to experience all these wonderful things. Your love and care are above measure!!!!!

Friday Fun

Friday was a fun time! We got up leisurely and enjoyed breakfast while the kids slept in a bit.

We enjoyed our first Chick-Fil-A sandwich before leaving to take a tour. We went to Shannon's work and got the grand tour. She works for Cyberwize, in the corporate office. It reminded me of the old Amway days.

Then we took a trip to Shawn's work (Pacom) and met the workers there, two of which had those wonderful Australian accents.

We stopped by Coral Connection, which is where Shawn has gotten all his advice and help in setting up a salt water tank. He has also designed a nice website for them. www.coralconnectionsarasota.com

Then we went to Siesta Key Beach. This was Mike's first time on the beach. We all enjoyed it very much. The kids took Chewy there and he most certainly enjoyed the beautiful white sand and friendly people. I gathered many shells that I can't wait to wash and sort for my bus kids.

We then drove to Long Boat Key. This was another nice beach though not as deep. I gathered more shells and enjoyed it very much. The water was COLD!!!

On our way home we stopped by the apartments that Shawn and Shannon had lived in before. They are very nice also and not far from Long Boat Key.

We came home and put the Mexican Chicken in the oven to cook and then enjoyed that meal in front of the TV. After supper we watched War of the Worlds and then went to bed.

This is my kind of vacation. VERY RELAXED!! Thanks again, kids.

It is almost over and I look forward to getting back home and back into the groove. Hope Millie and Grandma survived!!!

Thursday Travels

We just got back from a nice visit with the Pinkleys. They are such hospitable people.

They live in a very nice mobile home retirement place. They have so many nice things they can participate in with their peers. It is very peaceful there.

They took us out to eat at "Sweet Tomatoes", I think it was called. It has very good food which consists of a long salad bar, soups, breads, pizza, spaghetti and ice cream. It was very delicious.

We then went for a ride and saw the church they go to and orange trees and palm trees and also visited a little village where people have homes with garages for their airplanes. I believe that was called Lehigh something or other. We have certainly never seen anything like that before. The homes were built right beside a small airport and the planes are able to go right down the streets and into the garages of their owners. Very interesting. Just about the time you think you've see it all then here comes something else.

Adventure awaits tomorrow, I am sure.

Vacation Voicings

This is such a blessing to be here with no real obligations! Shawn and Shannon have done a wonderful job providing a place of comfort and organization. Thank you to them and to Maleah and Casey for being so thoughtful to provide this. Also, while we are at it, thanks to Ryan who has given up his freedom to spend the week taking care of Millie and Grandma and who also gave us a ride to the airport at 5:30 in the morning and will be picking us up at 11:00 on this coming Sunday night. We do have some sweet and thoughtful children!

We enjoyed supper at Durango Steakhouse last night and then took a stroll on Lido Beach. It was not what you would call a "moonlit stroll", as it was very foggy. It was an experience. The sand truly is white and fine!

This is quite a different culture from Festus. For one thing, down by the beach there is a circle of shops and outdoor restaurants and nighttime is a busy time.

I heard on the news the other day that Sarasota is the #1 most unforgiving city in the United States to the homeless. I was thinking how horrible that was until we got here. I think I could shed light on that. For one thing, I don't think people are here unless they are tourists or rich enough to have a home. Even if you were homeless here you could sleep outside with no problem due to the moderate weather.

Tomorrow, we will be taking a trip down to Fort Myers to visit with the Pinkleys. They have a special place they are taking us out to eat. We may just have to ROLL home instead of fly!!

Friday we will be going fishing in the Bay if all works well and on Saturday, we are taking a sunset cruise. All of this is compliments of Shawn and Shannon's friend. http://www.catchthespiritfishing.com

Shan and I are having cooking time tonight. So,we will be relaxing at home.

I can't forget to gather LOTS of sea shells to take back with me for all the bus kids.

Enough for today!!

We're Here

I am blogging from beautiful Florida! This is like a dream.

The flight was nice. Mike had never flown before but was unusually calm. It is alway uncomfortable for him in tight places since he has such long legs but thankfully, the flights was less than two hours long. I was able to sit by a window and it was so amazing to see God's creation from ABOVE the clouds. It was almost like we could see the south pole under us as the clouds were solid, puffy and white.

We were able to observe the air brakes and the wings the whole time. I did have a bit of trouble with my ear stopping up. It happened about half way there and never opened again until we were on the ground and lined up to get off the plane. It sure felt good when it opened up.

Shawn picked us up and it was great to see him again. I'll tell you, my boys sure are hairy!!! There he was, all 6'6" of him, still slim as a pencil, with a hairy face!!! His baby brother is also sporting a beard and LOTS of hair these days.

We enjoyed the drive to the apartment in Shawn's more roomy Rav4. We went to Burger King, which is a short way from the apartment and brought it home, only to find that the Whopper Jrs we ordered were DOUBLE WHOPPERS!!! Yikes!! I couldn't eat all that BUT I could help myself to several Ferrero Rocher, temptingly placed!!

Chewy is definitely a sweet granddog. He took a little nap with me and then we went out on the lenai and took in some sunshine and cool breezes. He now sits in my lap as I type. He really wishes I had a bigger lap.

The apartment is very nice and Shannon has done a great job of organizing my boy!! I noticed they even have a schedule of who does what jobs on what days....definitely a lot like his growing up days!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!HA HAHAHAHAHAHA Hats off to Shan!

Well, now that I know how to get on here, I will have plenty of time for blogging this week!!!

God is so good and His creation is beyond description!!! Thank you, Lord, for this much needed vacation!!

Quick Post

Well, I am very excited and busy trying to get packed and cooking done for the "stay-behinders"! In the morning at 5:30, we have to leave the house to get to the airport in time for our 7:30 flight to Florida. I can't wait to be on the plane with Mike. He has never done this and I think we will REALLY enjoy it. He has always been fearful of flying but I'll bet he will really like it. Shawn and Shannon have a fishing trip planned for us on Friday. And on Thursday, we will be going down to Fort Myers for a visit with the Pinkleys.

On the homefront, yesterday was a good day on the busses. Bus 5 had 45 with three first timers. Lesalie got baptized and her mom and grandmother were both in the service to see that. She is precious and I just pray that she will begin to grow and teach her little brothers what it means to be a christian.

One first timer was a young girl that came with Cheyenne. In past posts I mentioned that Cheyenne had gotten saved and baptized this year. She has kind of lost interest somewhat so I was pleasantly surprised that she got on with a friend.

Shawna has told me about her friend, Angel, over and over and I have stopped to visit her before but got Dad and not much response. So Saturday, Shawna once again told me to stop at Angels house because her mom said she had to see me first. I did and had a pleasant visit with her mom and sure enough, she rode with us and I feel sure will continue to do so. She is in the third grade and has a little two year old sister named Katilyn that was cute as a button.

At the apartments, I happened to see a little guy out that I hadn't seen before. I followed him to his apartment and met his mom who is a student and was very excited to let him ride with us. She has two grandfathers that are Lutheran ministers. I expect that he will continue to ride and he has a friend across the hall that is also a prospect.

I continue to see my teens coming and at least being attentive in church. I had gotten bibles for two girls a few weeks ago and one of them said, "Mrs. Cozart, I don't know what to do with it!" I told her she just needed to read it. Of course, you know what Satan said to me......"Well, she can't understand that!!!" And then I recognized his voice and realized that if I could understand it, so could she. There is only one way.....through the leadership of the Holy Spirit. It did really burden me to start to teach a bit more in the small time slots that we can teach, a little about each book. We do try to say the books of the bible occasionally on the bus. My mind is working and maybe on our trip I will have some time to put some things down on paper.

Well, I got my Food Saver that I have wanted for two years. It is great BUT....I can't figure out how to make TV dinners. This is what I did, though. I took the roast, potatoes and carrots from yesterday and I vacumn-packed and froze them. The main problem was the gravy. Liquid can be pulled into the motor as it is vacumning so you either have to put a paper towel in the mouth of the sack to soak up the liquid or get a better idea. I decided to freeze the gravy in an ice tray. I then took the cubes and put them in a zip lock bag so that you can take as many cubes as you like and thaw either in a pan or in the microwave for your gravy.

I vacumn-packed cornbread in small servings, Malt-o-meal muffins, rolls, cookies. I also made vegetable soup and Mexican Chicken and put it in the refrigerator for warming up. Lastly, I made Buttermilk Brownies so that Ryan will have some breakfast!

Millie has been pretty down in the dumps. I think she senses we are leaving and she is staying with Grandma. When Ryan walked in she perked up. I suppose she thinks the time won't be too bad.

Well, gotta go pack. Just wait til I get back with my new tan!!!(Anyone who knows me, knows that is a joke!!)

Sunshiny Sunday

Well, it gets harder and harder to do my updates! Our trip to Florida is fast approaching and is imperative that I keep Mike booked solidly before we have to leave. So, my time has been consumed on the phone and doing bookwork so that will not all be backed up when I get home.

Sunday was beautiful with a big load on the bus of 47. We had 3 first time visitors and most importantly a little 9 year old girl was saved. When she got on the bus to go home, we were a little discombobulated(I wonder if that is a word). Things are a little hectic when we are trying to make sure that we have as many on the bus to go home as we had coming in. But pretty soon, in the midst of trying to get a correct count, I heard Ashtin say..."Mrs. Cozart, I got saved today!!!!!" I assured her that I had seen her brought into "big church" to be announced. I gave her a hug and asked her if she understood what happened. "Yes!" she said. "I am going to heaven now!" I set down with her and explained that today was the day that she was "born again", today was her spiritual birthday. I explained that she had given her life to Jesus and that she would want to be obedient to Him and put aside the things she wanted to do if they were not what God wanted from her. Her eyes were wide and attentive. I explained that she needed to come to church and listen in class, read her bible and remember that when she prayed, God hears and He will NEVER leave her. I explained baptism and she was excited to try to get her family to come see her get baptized. I also told her that she needed to remember to tell other people because there were friends of hers that didn't know how to go to heaven. She excitedly said...."I'm going to tell my dad!!!!" Praise the Lord that He is still working His plan and we can see Him at work.

Another little guy, 8 years old, rode for the first time today. He was one of the New Orleans transplants and has some behavior problems. His mother assured me that he could ride the bus now because he has gotten his medicine. I was a little anxious but we had no trouble.

We always give a Snickers candy bar to each first timer and the person or persons who brought them. I handed little Mikael that candy bar and he had a big smile!!! I was busy passing out the other candy bars when I happened to catch a glimpse of him on the back seat. He was eating that candy bar like he hadn't had anything to eat in a year. Caramel was dripping off his lips and he had a sneaky look on his face. I thought, "Oh, bless his heart, he thinks he's not supposed to eat this on the bus." So, I assured him that it was ok for him to eat it.

I went back to the front of the bus to get started with our singing. We do love singing! From the back of the bus I heard a dreaded sound, "MIKAEL!!!" It snapped me back to reality! I had given him that CHOCOLATE candy and he wasn't supposed to have it!!!! Usually, when they take those medicines to help them control themselves, they also avoid caffeine and chocolate. I went straight to the back of the bus and took his little face in my hands. I said "Now Mikael, you weren't supposed to have that chocolate, were you?" He shook his head. I said, "Well, I want you to know that it is NOT chocolate that makes you be bad. You are bad when you do what the old devil wants you to do. The chocolate and the old devil together are not bigger than God. This bus belongs to Jesus and He doesn't want us to act bad on here so we will just pray that Jesus will help you keep from being bad. OK?" He shook that little angelic head in the affirmative and that was the last time I heard anyone scream his name. Of course, he was off the bus within 15 minutes of getting on so I am sure that was a help. I just hope his mother didn't have problems with him in the afternoon. I can't wait to see what the future holds for our dealings with that little one. Maybe, like the little boy whose father begged Jesus to heal his little boy who threw himself into the fire, this little one will understand and be healed!

Mt 17:14 (KJV) And when they were come to the multitude, there came to him a certain man, kneeling down to him, and saying,
15 Lord, have mercy on my son: for he is lunatick, and sore vexed: for ofttimes he falleth into the fire, and oft into the water.
16 And I brought him to thy disciples, and they could not cure him.
17 Then Jesus answered and said, O faithless and perverse generation, how long shall I be with you? how long shall I suffer you? bring him hither to me.
18 And Jesus rebuked the devil; and he departed out of him: and the child was cured from that very hour.

Yes, the Healer is here!

The other visitor was a 14 year old girl that visited with a friend. My husband even remarked that she was certainly listening intently during the sermon. I had already observed on the bus that when we started singing, all of her friends (three girls her age) were singing with much gusto, and she acted as if it shocked her. Soon that shock turned to curiosity and she began to try to sing also. Of course, we do a lot of chants on the bus so it is easy for everyone to participate, even if they don't know all the songs. I just couldn't help praying that God would bring this one to Himself also. She assured me that she would like us to pick her up at her house, though she would not be home this coming Sunday.

Fourteen is such a turbulent year. Of her friends, the majority of them have family problems and they need so much to trust the Lord. Satan is launching an all out attack to get them to be fearful especially in physical situations. Hormones play a big roll in this, I am sure but we have several girls who have experienced "anxiety attacks"; which brings me to the next funny story.

Kelcee is a second grader. She has lots of siblings from many different family combinations. She is her mother's baby and a bit whiny. She came to the front of the bus early on the morning ride to ask me if she could go to the 4th grade class with one of her step sisters. When I acted unsure she said, "Do you know I have "anxiety attacks"? OH MY!!!! I put my arm around that little one and had quite a discussion about how she has no reason to be afraid on the bus or at Sunday School. I reminded her that she can always pray and Jesus can help her when she is afraid. BTW, she did go to her regular class. Later, her big sister said, "Mrs. Cozart, Kelcee could really have a heart attack, you know." I assured her that Jesus was in control of that and she shouldn't be putting that thought in her sisters mind. She said "My mom said that!" What do we do!!! I just pray that some way we can make a difference and give hope that will be passed on to the parents.

That about wraps up the fun we had Sunday. I look forward to next weekend and then to our trip on Tuesday to Florida!!!

Blessings Again

I really love the life that we have. Oh, there are a few things that could be changed but basically it is very fulfilling.

It is a blessing to be used in the Lord's service. I pray that until my dying day I will be able to be used in some way!!

I have had a few thoughts about what to type next but it seems that I need to say, whatever God has for my future will be for my good, whatever that may be.

Bus 5 was the number one bus again today with 33. We had no first time visitors and Bus 3 is sneaking up on us with 30 or 31 and they had 4 first time visitors. Those first time visitors are what increases the bus attendance and ensures steady growth!

Several things of interest happened today. For one thing C____ came today. She is a sweetie; cute as a button but very much a deceiver and manipulator for her 7 years. She knows how to look at you and how to say things just right to get her way, whether it be to fain an illness or cry because someone has hurt her feelings. You just can't help loving her but you know she is deceitful.

In my couselor reading I have read about how wrong it is to "support" someone when they are doing wrong. It hit me yesterday when this little one tried to tell me that she had another friend that she was going to invite and could she have a piece of bubble gum to give to her. Hmmmmmmmmmmmm, I said something about her being a manipulator. She didn't know what that meant so I explained that it was someone that might use cute looks or nice words to get people to do what they wanted. She just giggled and I dropped it. Today she began with her little deceitful ways and I thought....."NO, this needs to be addressed!" So I again mentioned something about her being "a little manipulator"!! I said it is a teasing way to try to get her attention to what I was trying to show her. The next thing I knew, she was crying. I went back and put my arm around her and asked why she was crying. Of course, she said I had hurt her feelings. I hugged her up and put her on my lap and told her I was truly sorry for hurting her feelings but I took the opportunity to talk again about the manipulation. I explained that it was the opposite of being honest. I explained that when she lied, she was breaking God's commandment and that sin was against Him. She has asked Jesus into her heart and she and her mom both were baptized several months ago. So, I used that to try to show her that she had given her life to Jesus and she needed to understand that Jesus did not want her to be a manipulator. I assured her of my love and told her I would be praying for her to be able to get control of those actions. She hugged me and hopefully, it will make a difference in her life some day.

Tina was at church today. She used to ride Bus 5 but has moved and is now riding Bus 4. It tickles me that she comes pretty faithfully. She is an adult that has had quite a life. She has three children that are obviously from three different fathers. From what she has told me, she had a pretty dysfunctional childhood. Her sister still lives on our route and I have tried to get her to come but she told me recently that she was too young(She is probably 25-26) and she doesn't want to quit having fun yet. I must continue to pray and go to Amy.

Then there was the 6th grade boy who rode for his second time. His sister came with him on Skating Sunday. There was mass confusion that day and I really didn't get to talk to them much. His sister was sick this morning but he came anyway. I could tell by his expression on the way home that he was in deep thought so I sit down beside him and asked him if everything was ok. He thought a minute and then said he thought so. I couldn't leave that alone so I said, "Is there something that you have heard that was confusing?" He let me know that he had heard some confusing things.

I began to try to pinpoint what it was but he was unable to put it into words. So I began to question him about his past church going. He had gone to a church that teaches more a good works philosophy.

In a short 15 minutes, I tried to question things he understood, only to find out that he was really in the dark even about Creation. I told him to please feel free to ask me anything if he needed to talk and he promised he would. He also promised that he would keep coming.

God was at work and many things He was doing, I am sure did not catch my attention. Thank you, Lord for showing me what you did.

I sang a song this morning called "Free To Go Home". I heard this song on the new Collingsworth CD that I got for Christmas. I had heard the song years ago but they sang new life into it. It spoke to me in such a sweet way and I just knew that this had to be my next solo.

I love to watch the Lord do his work of healing and stirring of hearts. I sang and I saw several people who were touched, just as I was with the words.

When I heard the song, it spoke volumns to me about how the freedom from Satan's shackles was such a blessing. I am NOT free from sin, but praise the Lord, I do not have to be a slave to it, and that's what was such a blessing to me in the song. But God, in His grace let it minister to a couple of families in the congregation that had recently lost loved ones. I am in awe of His working. The song was as follows:

He was feared, despised and banished,
The disease even ate at his soul
But when the work of the Master was finished,
He was clean and free to go home.

She was guilty, ashamed and defeated,
She deserved all the threats and the stones,
But when the Lord brought respect, love and pardon,
All she knew she was free to go home.

Chorus:
Free to go home, Free to go home,
He freed me so I could go home,
He came where I was in wonderful love,
Now I’m free, free to go home.

I was sick, guilty and dying,
I couldn’t face the loved ones I’d known,
But the Master of love’s re-creation
Made me worthy and free to go home.

I’m free from the fear of tomorrow,
I’m free from the guilt of the past,
For I’ve traded my shackles for a glorious song,
I’m free, free to go home.
I’m free, free to go home!

Bro. Himes preached two good messages in Jeremiah today. This morning the sermon was "Stay Close and Clean" speaking of the linen girdle that God told Jeremiah to wear and then to go bury. He then told him to go find it again and see that it was marred and unusable. His point was that we are, just like the girdle(which was like a belt) to stay close to the Lord and by staying close we could avoid the marring of sin on our lives.

Tonight he spoke on "How to Face Adversity". He explained how that God uses adversity in our lives to bring us to the place He needs us.

I'm excited about the trip very soon and we are going to get to not only visit Shawn and Shannon but probably will take a little trip down to Fort Myers to see Bro. & Mrs. Pinkley. That should be fun.

Hopefully, this post will clear my mind so I can go to sleep tonight!

Rethinking!

"When I think back about my line of thinking back in those days, I realize that I did not view my children properly. I somehow thought that if I constantly uplifted and encouraged them, that would produce the goodness I wished to see. This is where I went wrong. "

This is a paragraph from my post on November 16 of last year. Some of my new studies have given light to understanding that statement. I have been influenced by a common thought pattern of this culture.

Dr. Adams, in "The Christian Couselors Manual", has explained that there are several thoughts involved in the area of psychology today. Simply put, we are most familiar with Dr. Freud's views which assesses man to be a sociable animal(notice-not responsible to a Creator). He explains that a man has problems when he is not socialized properly. People in authority over him exercise constraints and depending upon his own personality they may impose a structure that was not meant to be his, thus causing psychological problems. Therefore, we have the common thought that the parents and stronger authority figures are the problem.

In order to take care of the problem, an expert, such as a psychologist, is the only person qualified to help an individual with these problems. The expert must, through a series of questions, identify the offending party (Mom is usually a real good place to start), and then take the place of that authority in this patient's life so as to recondition and resocialize him into ignoring the guilt and pricks of his conscience that a "going against the rules" will produce. OH MY!!! That one is easy for me to see through. Any bible-believing Christian has no trouble understanding that scripture violently opposes that view. Just read the book of Proverbs and see the many exhortations to obeying parents and authority!

But I was unaware of the sly trick of Satan in the work of Dr. B. F. Skinner. He, too, believes that only an expert can affect change in an individual but rather than employ a listening and advising stance, he goes to science and behavior modification.

Remember this that he, once again, believes in man as an animal and not responsible to a Creator. He believes man's problem is due to his environment and a modification of actions and reactions will settle the issue once and for all. Another words, he doesn't believe it is the individuals fault, we are all inherently good. All we need is for everyone to properly react to us with reward and punishment and our ills will be solved. There are two popular shows on TV now that are using this approach.

This is the one that seemed so feasible and right to me as I parented. I hated to see parents that were so harsh and corrected those children in front of others. I tried to always respect my child's privacy and never to embarrass him or her. I tried to reward the good acts and was very careful about punishment.

So, what was wrong with that? Plenty! For one thing, I had a hard time grasping that my child(though I knew it very well) was just a little sinner. I never thought that I would fall for the trick of thinking that my child was somehow different in that respect but "mother's love" is so faulty and impressionable.

What I should have been teaching my children is that the Bible is the final authority since it was written by our Creator. We are responsible to Him. We live and breathe for His glory. When we disobey His commandments, it is sin and we are responsible to Him for it.

To this day, I find myself watching for the "underdog" on the bus and trying to "love" him into right actions. I must come to grips with the fact that my "love" is powerless unless yielded to the working of the Holy Spirit. He alone can minister to a child through my "love".

This really is deep thinking and can influence a person to depression if not for the reality that we, as Christians, do have hope!! We are sinners! We do have problems! But there is not one that can not be handled when we properly yield, first of all, our souls to Him and then our lives to the obedience of His commandments. He is a gracious and loving God and has provided, not only, for our eternal salvation but for our victorious daily living.

Proverbs 6:20
"My son, keep thy father's commandment, and forsake not the law of thy mother."

New Study

I have determined thatone of my goals for this year will be to read through my bible once again. I am also going to put a lot of effort into the studying the Nouthetic Christian Counseling books I already have on hand and possibly ordering more.

For the past few days, I have been reading "The Christian Couselor's Manual" by Jay Adams. (these books may be ordered though www.timelesstexts.com).

This book is confirming in my mind that my upbringing was true and righteous. I remember so well how my parents would never let me by with making excuses. I knew better than to try. There was always the line that was drawn that was based on scripture and if I crossed it, then I must suffer the consequences. My parents would never state the answer, they would ask questions until I came up with the answer myself, and it was a concrete answer. God's word could not be challenged.

There was never the excuse that someone had wronged me. I was always brought back to the fact that I was not responsible for anyone but me and my reactions. That is simplistic but certainly freeing!

I have no hope other than "in Christ". I am a sinful wretch and worth nothing without His transforming power. See how freeing that is!! There is hope and it is not in my own flesh! There is no limit to what He can do! There is definitely limits to what I can do!!

One chapter deals with reconciliation which is a very important and basic problem we deal with. The following paragraph begins the chapter:

"Reconciliation is a change of relationship between persons (God and man; man and man) that involves at least three elements: (1) confession of sin to God and to any others who have been offended; (2) forgiveness by God and by the one who has been offended; (3) the establishment of a new relationship between the offender and God and between the offender and the offended party (parties). In reconciliation, enmity and alienation are replaced by peace and fellowship."

That is so fundamental to our happiness in life. Let's face it, if we became hermits we would never have to deal with someone that crosses our path and challenges us. We could do things our own way without fear of judgement, or challenge. Few people are able to actually live like that so we must learn to relate to other people as God challenges us to do.

One of the main situations that is fundamental to our getting along in the world, is our relationship with our spouse. If we can not even get along and live with our spouse in a life of godly love, then how can we possibly be used by the Holy Spirit to reach out to others?

Dr. Adams confronts the situation of christians who choose to live a life that is desire-oriented rather than commandment-oriented. The example of the marriage relationship problem is dealt with here. On page 119 he expounds further with this excerpt:

"For instance, a husband and wife may say, "I guess there is nothing left to our marriage---no love---no feeling---nothing," and thereby hope that the Christian counselor will concede tht a divorce is allowable on other than scriptural grounds. If they can get him to agree to this, they hope that their bad consciences over what they have already determined to do may be salved. They vainly look for balm in Gilead. But, instead, the nouthetic counselor replies: "I am sorry to hear that. I guess you will have to confess your sin and learn how to love one another , then." Their reaction to this usually is sheer astonishment.

"But" they protest, "we told you that we don't feel anything for each other any more."

"I understand, but that is irrelevant; God says that you must love one another. When you learn to do so, the feelings of love will follow. Love is not feeling first; it begins with obedient living."

"What? Do you mean to say that we must try to love one another contrary to all of our feelings?"

"Exactly!"

"But wouldn't that be hypocrisy?"

"No, that would be obedience to God who has commanded: 'Husbands, love your wives as Christ loved the church and gave Himself for her' (Ephesians 5:25). Joe, God says that you are responsible to love Phyllis; love begins with the husband, whose love must reflect the love of Jesus Christ (I John 4:19)."

"Oh, I couldn't love her that way!"

"Well, then, start at a lower level. Christ commanded: 'Love your neighbor as yourself' (Matthew 22:39) As Paul observed, she is your closest neighbor; you have to live with her (Ephesians 5:28-31)."

"I don't think I could do that either."

"All right, then, we'll begin at the lowest level of all: 'Love your enemies" (Matthew 5:44)! You see, there is no escape; God commands love, even toward an enemy. The two of you must repent of your sin and by the help of God learn to love each other, even if you begin by loving as enemies."

"But how can I love an enemy?"

"As I said, love is not feeling first. Hollywood and the TV have taught us that fallacious doctrine. Christians must reject it. Love is not getting but rather giving; ' God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son' (John 3:16); 'He loved me and gave Himself for me' (Galatians 2:20); and remember also Ephesians 5:25 that I just quoted. When you learn to give of yourself---your time, your money, your interest---you will eventually feel what you now want. But that feeling, to be enduring, must be the fruit, not the root of love. When you invest enough of yourself in another, you will feel what you wish for him: 'Where your treasure is, there will your heart be also' (Matthew 6:21). The "heart" speaks of the whole man, including his feelings."

"Well...perhaps; but, it still seems hypocritical."

"No, it is never hypocritical to obey God. You have fallen into a trap of the devil in thinking that it is. Every morning...contrary to my feelings (all of which encourage me to pull the covers over my head and go back to sleep)---I get up. Does that make me a hypocrite?"

"No, I guess not."

"What would make me a hypocrite, then?"

"Well, I suppose if you went about bragging that you loved to get up in the morning."

"Precisely! Now, if the Scriptures commands you give in concrete ways to your enemy (a 'cup of cold water' or 'something to eat' when he is hungry or thirsty); i.e., if you care for his needs, even though at first you don't feel like it, does that make you a hypocrite?"

"Well...I guess not."

"What would?"

"If you said that you felt like doing it."

"Right again. So, you see, it is not hypocrisy to work at love at all. That is the lie of Satan, who wants you to rationalize your desires not to give of yourselves to one another by excusing your failure with the protest that obedience to God without feeling is hypocrisy."

I don't know about you but this speaks volumes to me. I suppose this may mean I am to learn to love my mother-in-law more by serving her!

Thank you, Lord, that You are long-suffering!

Happy New Year 2006

Can you believe it is 2006 already? I will warn you younger people that the calendar passes by faster every year you age!

I've tried to think that through and I believe that the reason for that is that as you age, things are less awesome and mysterious to you. You don't anticipate things like you did when you were younger and not real sure how things worked. As you age, it all becomes "old hat".
I suppose that is why it is so neat for older people to stay around the young crowd. It helps you focus on things like a child sees them.

Depressing news for Bus 5 today. We had only 17 people which included 3 workers today. Too many people stayed up all night watching the ball drop or whatever they did!!!

We did have one little girl that came forward for salvation today. She is a 3rd grader. I was telling her how happy I was for her when she volunteered that the other two times she didn't really understand. That brought back old memories.

I asked Jesus to save me when I was 5 years old and I know that I understood the basics at that time but years later I dealt with such lack of assurance until my early 20's. My burden for these children is to help them understand the theology behind salvation. I know what it is but need to study it more to be able to express it in younger terms. Someday, I would really like to write a book for children about this wonderful gift of salvation. It is such a beautiful present but so many people never open it. Anotherwords, they accept Jesus as their Savior but then they selfishly put Him on a shelf.....dust him off on Sunday morning and go to church, then put him back on the shelf until an emergency comes up. I am convinced that there is so much more to salvation than I have experienced in my life.

I feel like Paul who said "O wretched man that I am! who shall deliver me from the body of this death?" I try so hard to be consistent in my spiritual life but the struggle is too much sometimes.

For instance, I have had several weeks now where the bible reading has been put to the back of the list of things to do. I can really tell it in my thought pattern and in my reaction to things. I hate being in this place and I know that the only thing that will bring me out is to determine to go back to "The Book" and put it in an important part of my life again.

Lord, how I need you to strengthen me in the spirit.